I’m Not Going to Be Bullied By a Girl

Along with a nearby clap of thunder, the wind picked up, and the rain transitioned from a vertical descent to a frontal assault. The umbrella became completely useless and almost flew out of my hands a number of times.

I was relatively fine because I had waterproof pants, but Ai Mi was already soaked from head to toe and an outline of her underwear was visible.

Of course, I looked away and tried to contend against the force of nature while trying to block as much rain as possible.

Ai Mi was not the least bit grateful. She raised her head and let the rain pour down as she enjoyed the feeling of rain trickling down her limbs.

“Its better if the sun never comes out again.” She yelled.

Do you really think youre a vampire? I mean would there even be a vampire as weak as you? You would probably starve to death if you had to attack people with your strength. But if you beg me while crying, I might spare a bit of my blood.

It happened all of a sudden when a different crackling sound appeared. Before I realized what happened, a huge fracture split the sky, then a large black building began toppling towards us.

No, it wasnt a building, it was a large tree. Im not sure if it was because the trees roots were rotten, but it began falling towards me and Ai Mi.

Shit, does the tree want to commit double homicide? Did you have a grudge on me in your past life, then waited for me for five hundred years after reincarnating as a tree? Why did you have to fall right now? How come someone whos destined to become a harem king be flattened by a mere plant?

The tree snapped near the bottom, but the bark still held on for a bit which delayed its speed.

Ai Mi was thoughtlessly standing in front of me. When she heard the sound of the tree breaking and the large black shadow descending from the sky, she froze and couldnt even scream for help.

Martial arts, especially Yin Yang Sanshou, is about anticipation and quick reactions. I instantly estimated the amount of time it would take for the tree to fall and compared it against the time it would take for us to dodge.

Its a bit dangerous, I would only have 0.1 seconds of margin if I dont make any mistakes. Lets get my sister out of the way first.

I snapped forward and shouted “watch out!” and shoved her to the side before she could react.

It might have been a bit barbaric, but its better than being squashed by a tree.

Ai Mi stumbled backwards, but couldnt stand still and sat down on the rain-covered stone street. But it was better to land with her butt than with the back of her head, the worst case would be a slightly wetter dress.

After being positive my sister was out of danger, I let go of the umbrella and let it be blown away so it wouldnt slow me down.

If a martial artist focuses their concentration, especially with the help of adrenaline, they would see their enemies in slow motion, like the tree that was falling towards me.

I could have avoided it unscathed, but I suddenly had a thought, which was in short a mistake.

Although gramps have already told me the wuxia moves you see in on TV or in novels are all bullshit… but subconsciously I still thought they existed.

Especially when gramps praised my improvement, it inevitably made me a bit cocky.

So I had an impossibly stupid idea, which was to use Yin Yang Sanshou to change the force from the tree and shift it towards another direction. Then Ai Mi would be safer and she would also respect me more.

“So my brother is even more incredible than superman! Ive acted inconsiderate towards you before, but please excuse your immature sister.”

Would she say something like that?

I wasted the tiny amount of margin time I had when I was having stupid thoughts.

As the black shadow began to drop on my face, my body ordered me: Dodge it, you idiot. You watched way too many wuxia movies. If you dont dodge it, youre going to die in front of your sister.

I quickly turned my heels around and ran towards Ai Mi. But since I wasnt used to wearing rain boots, paired with the fact the ground was wet and slippery, I made a mistake and slipped.

Then, the tree that was thick enough to be enveloped by one persons arms, fell onto my back.

“Its over.” Thats what I thought at the time, but I tried my best to disperse as much of its force as I could. I tried to act like a cotton ball and move along with the flow and not go against the force.

There was aCLANG followed by aBANG. I thought all my innards had leaked out after my ribs were crushed into a pulp. I couldnt help feeling a bit of sorrow.

I had such a miserable death even though I havent done anything bad. Congratulations tree, you were able to get your revenge after five hundred years. now you can go ahead and reincarnate in peace.

Wait, I think the clang earlier was made by something metallic. I dont think I have anything metal on my body. Unless Im actually a robot made by my dad, and hes been progressively giving me an aging body so I didnt notice anything.

Wait, that doesnt sound right. What kind of shitty robot wouldnt even be able to beat Little Tyrant? Im a defective robot, I dont have the courage to face brother Optimus Prime anymore.

After feeling around a bit, I realized my ribs werent broken even though I was under the tree.

It seems the clang from earlier was the tree knocking down and flattening a nearby garbage can.

I was actually saved by a garbage can! I have to take the remains back home and worship it, then pass it down to my descendants. Its noble sacrifice created a tiny space between the tree and the road. My life wasnt in any danger, but I was pressed against the road tightly so I couldnt crawl out.

It kind of seems like Im not going to make it.

They say those who survive a catastrophe are bound to have good luck later on, so I have to go and buy the lottery! Ai Mi, why are you just staring blankly? Hurry up and call the bodyguards. The space seems to be stable for now, but who knows how long it would hold.

Hey, why… are you crying?